What if Dorothy had a cat?
Instead of a…Toto?
Now, before all you brindle Cairn fans get your short, wiry coats twisted up into a course scruff — I’ve nothing against your Terriers. Per se. After a recent rescreening of the 70th Anniversary Blu-ray Disc of The Wizard of Oz, it’s simply a question I found myself asking.
Aloud. Alone. And often.
There’s a problem lurking ‘round these parts. We’re all fairly sure of it, aren’t we? Yet not one of us has the guts to tear up the carpet and exclaim:
“Ah…Mr. Travis, please get a life.”
So, of primary import, even in early 1600s Americana — I seriously doubt any farm-bred, teenage girl would be allowed the eccentricity of having a cat off, or G-D forbid — on a leash.
The only reason Elmira Gulch owned a cat was that she was a wealthy, rural spinster — who lived alone and occasionally suffered mice infestations — in that whirlwind of an updo she referred to as: “My hair.”
But — an off-leash cat? The Gale Dust Dynasty simply would not have it. I can see Em —wiping her tiny, perpetually wet hands up, down and across her calico Rural Shrump — as I would have called it. I lost all respect for that woman when she nixed the cat idea in lieu of a dog. Because we all know how that worked out.
Here’s the scenario:
DOROTHY[Whilst jitterbugging her way atop a gutter’s jagged edge, no doubt]:
Aunt Em? Can I get a cat?